Wow! What a whirlwind day. This "Derailed" blog thing has really taken off. One of my readers invited me over to her estate on 42nd St. for a dinner party. I wasn't in the door more than two minutes when Larry King accosted me.
"Hey Conductor to the Stars!"
"Hey Larry!"
"What brings you here?"
"The lady who owns this joint reads my blog, I think her name is Madame Tussaud, anyway she says she loves my stuff and she invited me over to hobnob with "the beautiful people. "
"Well we're pleased to have you here. Ya know... I hear good things about 'Derailed.' I hear book deal. I hear movie deal."
"Yeah Larry...From your lips to God's ears."
"No, really! Woody and I were just talking about you. I think he has something in mind. You should go over and talk to him. He's sitting over there in the corner."
"Nothing ventured, nothing gained... I guess. Thanks Larry! Oh, by the way...You need a mint!"
"Woody...Woodman...Woodster! Woody, I love ya babe."
"Well then... you're the only one. Ever since the Soon-Yi thing, I've become a parhia at these parties. Yoko Ono gets a better reception than me!"
"Well then, I guess we'll have plenty of time to talk. Larry King tells me you're thinking of developing a project around "Derailed." Is that true?
"I'm very interested. In fact I was just trying to convince Robin Williams to portray you.
"Woodman, Ya know I love ya, but I really don't think Robin and I look anything alike.
I really have someone else in mind. Someone who can better capture my soul. Someone like...
"No really Sam. I think you'd be perfect for the part!
I wasn't at the party long when I started to hear people muttering things like: "That's HIM!" and "Conductor to the Stars" and "Movie deal." Before I knew it, I was surrounded.
"Julia baby, don't embarrass yourself. I'm a married man!"
"I'M HOT! Oh I bet you say that to all the boys."
"Wow, I must be hot. I even met Baby Suri."
"Baby, I don't know if 'Chicken of The Sea' is chicken or tuna either. What I do know... is that you'd be perfect as my wife (In the movie of course!) Have your girl call my girl. We'll do lunch!
