The Exorcist Part I- The Nightmare Begins

On Monday night, my wife made a new recipe called a Taco Bake. It is basically Kraft macaroni and cheese mixed with ground beef and taco seasoning. I found it tasty and decided to get a second helping before sitting down in front of the computer and writing a new post for this blog. I had good intentions of writing a story about the time I met the actress Linda Blair (Regan MacNeal from The Exorcist) on my train, but I was distracted by the television, which is in the same room as the computer. My wife and daughters were watching the latest episode of “Supernanny,” in which a four-year-old dictator named Sean (a demon child) was shown cussing, crying, whining, hitting, kicking , spitting, punching, biting, and in general just being plain evil. His police officer father, and ER nurse mother didn’t have a clue what to do with him, so…they did nothing. Before the show ended, “Supernanny” had changed Sean from a lion into a lamb, all within the coveted 9-10pm time slot.

As I drifted off to sleep that night, I thought about the night's events. I was impressed by how wise Supernanny had been. I then thought about how tasty the Taco Bake was. Next, I regretted not finding time to write The Linda Blair story, but I figured I’d save it for another day, and then...I drifted off to sleep.

That evening I had the strangest dream:
(imagine screen going wavy for a dream sequence.)

Supernanny Jo is called to the home of Regan, a little girl that is possessed by the devil. Regan’s mother leads Supernanny into the little girl’s bedroom, and finds that her bed is levitating three feet off the ground.

Supernanny: (British accent) What’s this then?

Regan: GET OUT!!!

Supernanny: Regan, you’ve been a very naughty girl. It’s time to go to the naughty chair.

Regan: Your mother is a #$%*

Suppernanny Jo pulls Regan out of the bed and places her in the naughty chair. Regan’s face is full of pustules and her head twists in a 360 degree turn.

Supernanny: Aye, you’re a clever one aren’t you? Are you ready to say sorry?

Regan: Eat #$%! (Spews pea soup in supernanny’s face.)

It was about this time that I woke up. I guess I’ll never know if Supernanny was able to exorcise Regan’s demons, or if like the priest in the movie, she gets thrown out of the window. I do know, however, that you should never eat Mexican food before bedtime.