CauseI'vebeenactinglikesourmilkallonthefloor
It'syourfaultyoudidn'tshuttherefrigerator
Maybethat'sthereasonI'vebeenactingsoco-o-o-old
When I was a kid, I used to be pretty good at the old McDonald’s jingle: “Twoallbeefpattiesspecialsaucelettucecheesepicklesonionsona
sesameseedbun,” so I thought it would be fun to learn the words to “Sweet Escape.” With the help of my daughter, I pretty much got it down.
A few weeks back, I was chauffeuring ‘C’ and her two friends around, when “Sweet Escape” came on the radio. I seized the opportunity to showcase just how hip and happenin’ I was.
I sang:
CauseI'vebeenactinglikesourmilkallonthefloor
It'syourfaultyoudidn'tshuttherefrigerator
Maybethat'sthereasonI'vebeenactingsoco-o-o-old
I looked in the rear view mirror, expecting to see the look of amazement on three teenage faces. My own reflection, however, sent me back in time, kind of like "Alice Through the Looking Glass."
Summer, 1974.
My 16-year old sister Maureen and I, (age 12,) are seated in the back seat of a brown, 1974 GTO. ‘Larry,’ the man whose child we just babysat for, is in the driver’s seat, twisting the car’s radio dials, looking for just the right song to impress my sister and me. The radio’s red needle stops on 1300AM-WAVZ. He knows he’s found the perfect song… “My Eyes Adored You” by Frankie Valle and The Four Seasons.
He turns the volume up and croons along:
My J’eyes J’a J’ored J’ou
Though I never laid a hand on you
My J’eyes J’a J’ored J’ou
The blue dashboard lights reflect in Larry’s black, plastic-rimmed glasses, matching his powder blue leisure suit perfectly. His pencil neck is lost in his silk shirt's over sized collar.
Like a million miles away from me
You couldn’t see how I
J’a J’ored J’ou
He is intentionally bastardizing the lyrics, almost as if to say, “I’m not only hip...I’m funny too.” My sister and I roll our eyes and try to stifle our laughter.
So close
So close
And yet so far
What a dork!
This is what the girls in the backseat are thinking; I can see it on their faces. One of the girls leans over and whispers in my daughter’s ear, “You poor thing…you must really be embarrassed.” It was then I knew... I am “Leisure Suit Larry.”
6 comments:
Bobby,
But look at the memories you created. I still laugh when I think of that ride home. "C" and her friends will be laughing about that too for a long time.
Love your older sister (thanks for pointing that out), Maureen
You're not alone! Every night we dance to the "Woo Hoo" song. It's L's favorite song and HE makes us dance. Kind of a strange song for a 2 1/2 year old but what can you do? He's got some moves. And for now he still thinks we're cool.
Anyway, I've been trying to figure those words out so thanks for the lyrics!
-E
That's a good one... I can't wait to embarrass my daughter. My dad was fearless with this tactic. He was a full Col. at West Point when one Christmas day my younger teenage sister had a bunch of her snobby friends over doing whatever it is they do, when my dad came into the family room to say "hello" after which my dad asked them if they wanted to see what he got for Christmas. They all responded, "Sure!". He left the room for a minute and came back in wearing a pair of tighty whities briefs over his trousers. My sister was mortified! I walked by as he was entering the family room and was rolling on the floor once I discovered what he was up to. I almost choked to death I was laughing so hard.
Bob,
Great story and since you referenced the 4 Seasons, you are really a father for all seasons.
Keep up the great parenting!!!
Jamie
Hey... at least Leisure Suit Larry has a cool Leisure Suit.
Loved this Story!!
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